We bundled Ruby up in
umpteen layers, fastened her into her car seat, I delicately placed myself in
the back of the car with her, and we set off home.
As soon as Ruby had
arrived in the world and we were moved down off the labour ward, we desperately
wanted to be home, even more so after Gary got sternly told off for sitting on my bed :-(. As a result we left the same day and were home for tea,
which was great. We had family arrive a few minutes after we got home, bearing
bags of fish and chips, I can’t really remember… but more than likely we would
have had nothing prepared for tea, so a big bonus.
Ruby had slept all
day in hospital so I think we were in a false sense of security bringing her
home, she was wonderful until about midnight when we went to bed then her eyes
flicked open and the crying started, I remember asking Gary to
take us back to hospital, at this point we had been up for two days with no
sleep. I can now look back, laugh and think it was a good thing, it was our
hardest point and we compare any crying sessions now to it…needless to say with
even the smallest bit of sleep in us they never seem as bad as that first night
did.
I was feeding Ruby
myself so I just think she was hungry and my milk took a day or so to come in,
so I think if I was able to go back in time I would have stayed in hospital
over night for the support…but then it was so special being at home and waking
up all in the same bed as a family for the first time.
The midwife visits
were great, I loved our midwife, the first morning she just came up to our room
sat on the end of the bed and was such a positive person to have around,
laughing and reading our paper whilst we sorted Rubes out, defiantly make use
of their visits have any questions ready even the silly ones, because believe
me she will ask you some nice embarrassing ones too.
Ruby doesn't have any
older siblings, but we had wondered how her arrival would effect our cat ‘Mika’
at first she was pleased we were home, happy to have her tea and a little
inquisitive of the odd smelling little person we had with us, once she realised
this little person made noise she was less impressed, and disappeared outside
far more than she used to. As Ruby got bigger they grew very close, but since
Ruby has started crawling Mika has backed off, realising she can’t escape from
her by going upstairs, so again we find she spends a lot of time outside.
The first two weeks
flew by and were very special Gary had extended his paternity leave with a
weeks holiday which was great, we spent days out as a three and when Ruby was 2
weeks old we ventured out on a road trip to a shopping center for the day, Ruby
slept the whole day and it was lovely getting out and spending time with Gary.
We said the whole way
through our pregnancy that we would always make time for a date night at least
once a month, in reality it is hard, Gary’s mum and my mum were great and had
Rubes for a couple of hours so we could go to the cinema. On the first cinema
night the breast pump came in very handy as it was a uncomfortable journey
after a few hours not feeding, pumping whilst Gary drove us home in the dark-
if only I could have done it whilst watching the film, oh well it made us
laugh, not your normal end to a date night.
My biggest tip is
take the support from people if they offer, the offers will slow down, your
partner goes back to work and you realise months later there is no need to feel
guilty about having some you time, even if it is a bath whilst daddy watches
the little one.
Not many days in, and
Ruby fired poo in a jet as if you had turned on a hosepipe, across her bedroom
from the cot top changer, across the carpet and up the wall. I remember it so
clearly and the thought always makes me crack up, Gary was helping change her,
he shot back and threw himself onto the bed laughing, I was holding Rubes to
the changer whilst trying to get a breath between laughs, we laughed and
laughed. I have heard many similar poo tales.
If you do things as a
team you will feel so much more support and everything is that little bit
easier. Thank god both of us were there, neither one of us would have believed
it unless we had seen it.
I found that at 8 o’clock every night I got
baby blues, it was like a switch, I was fine feeling really good, glowing with
this special love then suddenly I was teary and needy. Gary was great, I
explained as best a hormonal new mum could and he just knew a cuddle would sort
it, it only lasted for a couple of weeks, but its really important to know its
ok, and that to share any feelings you both have with each other.
It is the best
experience; nothing is as special as making their moses basket up, and waking up as a
family in your home for the first morning. Although Ruby wouldn't sleep in her basket and for the first two weeks we all crammed in our double bed for the majority of the nights.
Enjoy every minute,
everyone said to us ‘they don’t stay little for long’ at the time whilst you
are changing countless nappies, non stop feeding, wiping up sick and grabbing a
few hours kip when you can, you think they will stay small, floppy babies
forever, but they don’t.
I am constantly
amazed when I look at Rubes pulling herself up to standing, babbling, and
crawling around the house generally leaving a trail of destruction behind her,
that only 10 months ago she was brand new, wrinkly, small and totally dependent
on us…I will admit I miss it a little.
C
